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Monday, August 30, 2004
Official Poverty Statistics - though personally, I think an individual making $10,000 a year living alone, or a family of four making $20,000 a year, is probably pretty impoverished! Not according to the government though!
Ah, our first home.
My apologies, Rob, I posted without reading very carefully: there was a typo, it's actually 1.3 Trillion, not billion. Trillion. It was a big tax cut.

More details:

The tax cuts were $1.3 trillion. Trillion. Over 10 years. That's $130 billion per year, on average. There are 34.9 million Americans living below the poverty line. If you assume an average case -- a family of four -- then that means 8.725 million families earning less than $18,500 or so per year (from the 2003 Housing & Human Services guidelines for poverty).

So: $130 billion / 8.725 million = $14,899.71 per family.
The news:

The cat has outdone herself again. With no bathtubs to soil, the cat decided that a sink was a fine place to seek relief. Impressive.

The real news:

I've got business cards. These are my first EVER. Even my wife has had business cards and I've had about 15 more jobs than she has. Maybe that why I'm just getting cards?

Friday, August 27, 2004
If the election's got you down, you can always find humor in it all here.
An interesting new tactic.

I know when I think of an open-door party, I think of Republicans, right away.
An interesting statistic, created by my brother-in-law, and relayed to me by my sister (it's a family affair):

Scott did a bunch of research regarding that Census Bureau thing, about how much money was in the tax cuts Bush passed (1.3 billion), how many Americans (12.5% of the country out of 281,481,296 Americans, so about 35 million people) are below the poverty line (defined as less than $18k per year), and basically figured out that for the cost of that tax cut we could have pulled almost every man, woman, and child in this country out of “poverty.” And that’s with unemployment up at around 6% (also thanks to the Bush administration, which supports exporting jobs, and which, despite Bush’s statement that “job creation is the number one priority of economic policy out of Washington, D.C.” [president’s economic forum] has managed not only to lose jobs, but to hold the second worst “job creation” record since Herbert Hoover (who, you may remember, had this small depression thing to deal with).
Thursday, August 26, 2004
http://www.cnn.com/2004/ALLPOLITICS/08/26/rnc.protesters.ap/index.html

Interesting...1 in 20 New Yorkers believe in violent protests. Let's say that 1/2 of all New Yorkers are registered voters. So...5% of 4.5 million New Yorkers believe in violent protests. Let's look closer at the number. 225,000 New Yorkers are ok with violent protests. That's a lot bigger than our little Albemarle County here. They should deploy these people. Violent protest sounds like war to me. C'est tout.
From our friend Jennifer, who works for IBM - one of her customers is the Census Bureau...See the article here.

Subject: Census Bureau says 1.3 million more Americans in poverty - Aug. 26, 2004

This data has been much anticipated (my project deployed it today on our website: http://factfinder.census.gov).

Apparently, there was a great deal of controversy surrounding the release date for this Income and Poverty data. We usually deploy this data in October, but received pressure to deploy it earlier (read: release bad economic data further from the election so the Bush Administration can spin it out of the news). Don't forget what his adminstration has done to this country in the last 4 years!

Census Bureau says 1.3 million more Americans in poverty - Aug. 26, 2004 *
Survey: More Americans in poverty
Census Bureau report says 1.3 million slipped below benchmark; health care coverage also declines.
August 26, 2004: 10:28 AM EDT
MICROSOFT VS. GM

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computershave enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gatesreportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "IfGM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all bedriving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:If GM had developed technology like! Microsoft, we would all be driving carswith the following characteristics (and I just love this part):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a newcar.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would haveto pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car,restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reasonyou would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstallthe engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, fivetimes as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent ofthe roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all bereplaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warninglight.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out andrefuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned thekey and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how todrive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the samemanner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
Participate September 2nd!

www.thegreatamericanshoutout.org
As you may or may not know...

I decided to curse my existence by joining a real consulting firm in May. Since joining I have been on three different projects. Currently (and through November), I am working on a project in downtown DC. At least a couple times a week I try to take a break from work and go walking around within a radius of six blocks or so in an effort to learn the city better. I've noticed all that's here in the business district is restaurants, wine/liquor stores, drug stores,
and corporate businesses - no grocery stores, clothes stores, hobby stores, etc. Coincidence? I think not! All the vices are but a short walk away!

Needless to say, the $3 martini place three blocks over has been calling my name every day since I discovered it but I have thus far managed to resist its strong liquortational pull.
Tuesday, August 24, 2004
Someone get this man a Nobel Prize.

Upon closer reading, I have a question: just what ARE the effects of alcohol, other than drunkenness and a hangover?
Saturday, August 21, 2004
As heard on the radio: "Ladies and Gentlemen, we, the radio station, would like to announce our new director of requests Hellen Wait. So, if you would like to make a request, please go to Hellen Wait.

I thought it was funny.
Thursday, August 19, 2004
I hate you, i hate you, i don't even know you and I hate your guts...
I'll believe it when I see it.
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
People,
The blogs are hilarious! More on how bitter I am about work as soon as the smoke clears. I will say this, I just got to order my books today. Classes start tomorrow. Yay me!
I've found the Current Electoral Vote Predictor 2004 to be super informative and easy to load. I also like the "previous" button; you can watch Red v Blue over time.
Tuesday, August 17, 2004

Google works. Posted by Hello
What Republicans Must Believe

1) Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

2) Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

3) A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

4) Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

5) The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

6) If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

7) Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

8) HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

9) Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

10) A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

11) Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

12) The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's cocaine conviction is none of our business.

13) Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness, and you need our prayers for your recovery.

14) You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have the right to adopt.

15) What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

(Thanks to my sister, who for some reason doesn't have the "Blog it!" instinct...)
Ok, this has gotten out of control.
Saturday, August 14, 2004
Small correction to John's post: an EXHAUSTIVE search for his classes has turned up no clues. For those of you who know our house: I handed John his glasses at the dining room table, and we walked to the car out front, and got in. In the car, John realized he didn't have his glasses.
Thursday, August 12, 2004
This post courtesy of Michael W. Smith:

George Bush Sucker-Punches An Opponent
All quiet on the western front...

So, what happened to John on his birthday?

1. Got very sick from alcohol. Well, from not eating before drinking alcohol.
2. Went to work despite being really sick. Came home at 11:30 after throwing up outside for half an hour.
3. Lost his glasses somewhere in his house or car. A preliminary search has turned up no clues.
4. Missed the 4:15 showing of "Collateral" because the woman at Walmart took 25 minutes to get him some contact lenses. WTF?
5. Finally saw the movie at 7:20. Not bad.
6. Came within inches of being in an accident. Lights were off. Could have been his fault, except the guy failed to yield to cars coming both ways.
7. Despite all of this, Margaret managed to make a good day out of it.

No, I don't get wiser as I age. I just get weaker and more bitter.
So what the heck happened to gaming?
Wednesday, August 11, 2004
I know this guy sounds like he's raining on everyone's parade (and by everyone, I mean owners of 3+ ton SUVs), but I totally agree with him...
GET EM!
Tuesday, August 10, 2004
Read the second-to-last sentence. Why? WHY? You're asking WHY? HE WAS 79 YEARS OLD, THAT'S WHY! The statement should read "Authorities are attempting to determine how old his passenger was, and why that person was not driving instead of the old man, who clearly could not drive."
Sunday, August 08, 2004
Political poems are great.

a@be.com and 1234 if it asks you to sign in.
Friday, August 06, 2004
A moment of silence, please.
Isn't it ironic?
Thursday, August 05, 2004
This came in an email today:

Client#: 779
Email ID: cmm4q@virginia.edu

Dear Sir/Maddam;
>From our records we understand that you are qualified in your
>profession and
we are going to offer you a 1 time offer.
Our Univsersity can offer you a Pre-Qualified degree.

To obtain your degree with valid transcripts follow this link:
1highereducation.com?partid=c77 (I disabled the link)

Sincerly;
Alfreda Hilton
Administration Office

When did University become difficult to spell? How long has it been ok to use digits to write numbers less than ten in formal correspondence? WHY DO PEOPLE SPAM ME SO MUCH? At least they realize I'm qualified for something.

hahaha
Thanks for all the birthday posts!
Wednesday, August 04, 2004
I know you're all doing absolutely nothing. This is sad. I am going to cry.
Monday, August 02, 2004

Happy Birthday Leila,


I felt so inspired, I had to post this:


I hope this card finds you quite happy,
and that this warm summer day has not been crappy, craappee.


So eat some, drink some, and also be merry,
but don't drink too much of the products called dairy.

I really don't know where this little thing is going,
but you know how it is when the rhymes are flowing.

No more about rhyme schemes, lines, or meter -
you need to be breaking into a big ol' liter.

It's a celebration bitches,
so I'll be on my way,
enjoy yourself and happy birthday.


Happy Birthday, Leila!
Happy Birthday to Leila!