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Saturday, July 24, 2004
Today, for the first time since Harry banged Sally, I saw what 6:30am on a Saturday looked like and, let me tell you, I didn't like what I saw. So, this morning I was both sober and angry, which are both optimum attitudes for taking a test to determine your qualifications to teach a class grotesquely below your level.

As I entered Starbucks for that caffeinated concoction that blows me away, the barristress could not help but ask, "Who pissed you off so early in the morning?" To which I responded, "Life. Now, give me my coffee and leave me be." In hindsight, I think it was a bit uncalled for, but now she has an awful story to forever tell the future barristers of Starbucks.

Then I arrived at the testing site, took my seat and prepared to embark on a journey that proves I am intelligent enough to teach.  The essay question was......drum roll.........."Write an essay about something you were encouraged to do as a child that impacted you positively." In my positive state of mind, of course, I wrote about oral sex and how it has changed my life. I titled it, "Encouraged to be more oral in meretricious relationships."

Since I no longer need the results of that test to maintain my present employment with a private school, I wrote an essay that will stick in the mind of the grader forever. Not to mention I may not get a passing grade, which is six out of a possible ten points.

I now return to studying Legal Ethics (That still make me chuckle).


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