So, I know that I said my next race would be the Pensacola Extravaganza Shinding (not really the official name, but I can't recall it right now), but I got bored so I went to another race - The Flora-Bama Make It To The Line 4-mile Run. This race was sponsored by the Flora-Bama Lounge and Package Store.
The race started at the Florida-Alabama line, and went 2 miles into Alabama and back to Florida. At the end of the race, which I truly believe is the only reason I still run, you were rewarded with two bud light drafts. Now, I will never say that bud light is quality beer or anything, but I have drank lower beers and these were free. Even though you can't beat free with a buck, I am sure I can come up with quite a few things that can beat free. Like sex. Sex beats free, but I digress.
I am proud to say that I ran a fantastic 3.5 mile race. The officials, however, seem to think it was a four mile race and would not give me a coffee cup for the 3.5 miles that I wonderfully ran.
After dying at the 3.5 mile marker and practically jogging to the finish line, I came in at 30:33, which resulted in a 6th place finish in my age group and a 48th place finish overall out of 250 runners,joggers,exercise enthusiasts,athletes and, well, me.
Next week, the Pensacola Extravaganza Shindig, which is just a 5K. If I run 3.5 miles there like I ran 3.5 miles today, I may get some hardware. My solo medal from the Reindeer Run is getting lonely.
Until then........Harry Kwannukamas to you all!
First, George Allen. Now, Virgil Goode. Virginia's politicians sure are doing a wonderful job of spreading ignorance and making us look bad.
Ugh.
Ugh.
Today, I ran the Egg Nog Job (or the Eggnog Jog, whichever you prefer). Contrary to the advice of a very smart girlfriend, several co-workers and several more other runners, I ran the race while fighting a terrible cold - smart move Berry. I ran a fantastically disgusting 23:46, exactly one minute slower than last week's performance. I placed 53/140 and 4th in my age group.
Next up is the Pensacola Beach 5K/10K/Half Marathon/Marathon/1-mile fun run. Due to age restrictions, I have been told that I do no qualify for the 1-mile fun run, so I will "compete" in the 5k. (hopefully in better conditions healthwise).
Before I leave, however, I would be remiss if I did not share with you all some of the other holiday themed events that did not make it on to the publicly published calendar.
1. The Frosty the Snowman F@#k
2. The Stuff My Stocking Blowout
3. The Mrs. Santa Slam
4. The Noel Nose Picking Extravagansa
5. The Mistletoe Midget Toss
6. The No Christmas Gifts for Jews Cruise
7. The Ebeneazer Skeezer Shoot
8. The Comfort and Joy Cum For Joy
9. The Snow Blow Job Grand Prix
and my personal favorite
10. The Jingle Bell Bang
Harry Kwanukkamas to all!
Next up is the Pensacola Beach 5K/10K/Half Marathon/Marathon/1-mile fun run. Due to age restrictions, I have been told that I do no qualify for the 1-mile fun run, so I will "compete" in the 5k. (hopefully in better conditions healthwise).
Before I leave, however, I would be remiss if I did not share with you all some of the other holiday themed events that did not make it on to the publicly published calendar.
1. The Frosty the Snowman F@#k
2. The Stuff My Stocking Blowout
3. The Mrs. Santa Slam
4. The Noel Nose Picking Extravagansa
5. The Mistletoe Midget Toss
6. The No Christmas Gifts for Jews Cruise
7. The Ebeneazer Skeezer Shoot
8. The Comfort and Joy Cum For Joy
9. The Snow Blow Job Grand Prix
and my personal favorite
10. The Jingle Bell Bang
Harry Kwanukkamas to all!
Today, I ran the North Okaloosa Medical Center/YMCA Reindeer Run. I placed 11th over all and 2nd in my age group (25-29) with a time of 22:46. In my defense, I came in 11th because I decided it was warmer if I just urinated in my shorts (it was below freezing when the race started). Next week, the Eggnog Jog.
Between the strippers, dancers and hookers (Yes, there is a "difference" as I have learned.) in Vegas, I am amazed that you all found time to eat and gamble. At least you didn't sleep. Today was a tough day at work - for me that says alot. I just had to share because I am sure it will not happen again for a very long time.
I think there might be a whole other blog or site or something about Vegas...we'll get it posted in the next few days. Even though I just slept for 10 hours, I don't have the energy to post it all yet. BUT, to cut to the most important part of the trip, this is one of the last somethings that happened:
Good job, Phred. Good job.
Good job, Phred. Good job.
No real time to blog...we're sitting in the Vegas airport, waiting to board the plane. But to sum up:
We're leaving with more cash than we came with.
John bought new shoes.
Some things happened.
Vegas rocks.
There will be more details later. After we finally sleep.
We're leaving with more cash than we came with.
John bought new shoes.
Some things happened.
Vegas rocks.
There will be more details later. After we finally sleep.
Have you heard about the new Creationism Museum?
"A lot of that money is going into the animatronic dinosaurs, which are pictured as coexisting with modern humans before the Fall. According to the article, up to 50 million Americans believe this."
"A lot of that money is going into the animatronic dinosaurs, which are pictured as coexisting with modern humans before the Fall. According to the article, up to 50 million Americans believe this."
So, I have about 5 minutes to blog about our first day in Vegas. There is too much - let me sum up:
Our flight was uneventful, except for the couple hooking up in the seats in front of us between Charlotte and Vegas. The Charlotte airport, by the way, is AWESOME. It's basically an entire mall in the airport, with lots of food and shopping options. I could live there.
We got into Vegas, and were greeted by our personal drivers holding up a sign that said "Baxtons." Awesome. We were staying at the South Point casino/hotel for the first night, so we got checked in (and the $20 trick worked to get us a nice view) and ate the most amazing $4 buffet ever. Seriously. I haven't eaten since then - that was nearly 20 hours ago - and I'm not all that hungry yet. We're about to go eat there again. That should do it for today.
We all played a little video slots, which didn't result in much. Then Phred and Oh Bee Juan played craps. For hours. And did very, very well. Oh Bee Juan started with $20, and walked away with $475. Then we all went to the strip, where the boys played craps for about 20 minutes, and made a good profit. We saw the light show at Freemont (Valerie and I saw two light shows, one while the boys were playing craps) and walked around.
Okay, I'm taking too long, and we have to go eat and watch football. Just like Sunday at home. Let me sum up this way: Vegas is awesome.
Our flight was uneventful, except for the couple hooking up in the seats in front of us between Charlotte and Vegas. The Charlotte airport, by the way, is AWESOME. It's basically an entire mall in the airport, with lots of food and shopping options. I could live there.
We got into Vegas, and were greeted by our personal drivers holding up a sign that said "Baxtons." Awesome. We were staying at the South Point casino/hotel for the first night, so we got checked in (and the $20 trick worked to get us a nice view) and ate the most amazing $4 buffet ever. Seriously. I haven't eaten since then - that was nearly 20 hours ago - and I'm not all that hungry yet. We're about to go eat there again. That should do it for today.
We all played a little video slots, which didn't result in much. Then Phred and Oh Bee Juan played craps. For hours. And did very, very well. Oh Bee Juan started with $20, and walked away with $475. Then we all went to the strip, where the boys played craps for about 20 minutes, and made a good profit. We saw the light show at Freemont (Valerie and I saw two light shows, one while the boys were playing craps) and walked around.
Okay, I'm taking too long, and we have to go eat and watch football. Just like Sunday at home. Let me sum up this way: Vegas is awesome.
It's November 7th - don't forget to vote! If you live in Virginia, your options are:
James Webb or
A big fat bully
Vote early, vote often!
James Webb or
A big fat bully
Vote early, vote often!
| Your Deadly Sins |
| Lust: 80% |
| Gluttony: 20% |
| Envy: 0% |
| Greed: 0% |
| Pride: 0% |
| Sloth: 0% |
| Wrath: 0% |
| Chance You'll Go to Hell: 14% |
| You'll die while in the throws of passion - the best way to go. |
So, I'm sitting in a big traffic backup this morning.
I know, imagine that occurring in Northern Virginia. What a shock!
Anyway, I'm sitting there pondering the meaning of life or rocket bombing the 100 cars in front of me I can't remember which one, when I look out my passenger window and see a man standing in the lane next to me. Now you might think that's weird, as I did for a split second, but then I noticed that he was standing behind a garbage truck. He was the garbage man, picking up the trash cans and dumping the contents into the back of the truck. Good thing it was too cold to have the top down this morning!
What is the point of this story? Well, as is very often the case in Northern Virginia, a road that obviously used to be a rural highway has been converted into a major traffic thoroughfare by the home builders/buyers leapfrogging the old country homes out into the ex-urbs. As most of you on this Blog have no doubt seen on 29 between Charlottesville and DC, houses are built right on the highway with driveways connecting to the major road. There is/was no concept of a subdivision with such low building density.
I was on my way to the gym at 7:15 this morning on the road, and why wouldn't it be horribly backed up at 7:15? Silly me, I should've gotten up at 5:30 to beat traffic. But I digress...the point of this pointless story is that I'm sitting on this road, and the garbage truck is stopping, the guy gets out, dumps the trash into the truck, compacts it, and then hops back into this truck, drives 50 feet to the next driveway, repeat...and all of this is having absolutely no effect on the traffic flow. It's as if having a guy stopping a truck every 50 feet on a major highway is a normal thing.
I can't wait to move.
I know, imagine that occurring in Northern Virginia. What a shock!
Anyway, I'm sitting there pondering the meaning of life or rocket bombing the 100 cars in front of me I can't remember which one, when I look out my passenger window and see a man standing in the lane next to me. Now you might think that's weird, as I did for a split second, but then I noticed that he was standing behind a garbage truck. He was the garbage man, picking up the trash cans and dumping the contents into the back of the truck. Good thing it was too cold to have the top down this morning!
What is the point of this story? Well, as is very often the case in Northern Virginia, a road that obviously used to be a rural highway has been converted into a major traffic thoroughfare by the home builders/buyers leapfrogging the old country homes out into the ex-urbs. As most of you on this Blog have no doubt seen on 29 between Charlottesville and DC, houses are built right on the highway with driveways connecting to the major road. There is/was no concept of a subdivision with such low building density.
I was on my way to the gym at 7:15 this morning on the road, and why wouldn't it be horribly backed up at 7:15? Silly me, I should've gotten up at 5:30 to beat traffic. But I digress...the point of this pointless story is that I'm sitting on this road, and the garbage truck is stopping, the guy gets out, dumps the trash into the truck, compacts it, and then hops back into this truck, drives 50 feet to the next driveway, repeat...and all of this is having absolutely no effect on the traffic flow. It's as if having a guy stopping a truck every 50 feet on a major highway is a normal thing.
I can't wait to move.
Another shot of Davis, shortly after donning his Lion costume. Davis, what does a lion say? RAAAAAWWWWRRRR!
I am having a business card swap. If you will, please send your business card to:
Jelani A. Berry
Assistant Public Defender
1-A Ninth Avenue
Shalimar, Florida 32579
Upon receipt, I will send you one of my business cards. In addition to receiving a business card inscribed with my illustrious name and occupation, you will receive that warm feeling of doing something completely useless, but fun nonetheless.
Jelani A. Berry
Assistant Public Defender
1-A Ninth Avenue
Shalimar, Florida 32579
Upon receipt, I will send you one of my business cards. In addition to receiving a business card inscribed with my illustrious name and occupation, you will receive that warm feeling of doing something completely useless, but fun nonetheless.
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